When did life start getting so serious?

I have spent the last few weeks pouring over numerous financial documents, having numerous conversations with people trying to sell me their “best” deals – I’m jaded by the whole process and at this point I can just about summon the energy to do anything else.

The re-mortgage should be finalised next week…hopefully. On top of that I have had to contend with changing my electric/gas providers as the “budget deal” I had with my current supplier Scottish Power has just run out - they haven’t dropped their prices recently… and they have said they won't be either in the future.

There must be some central database with my details showing that my deal was up – this week has seen three energy companies knocking at more doors trying to sell the same old cobblers products.

Lucky for me I have the Internet and I can do the price comparisons – the older residents of my street are not so lucky and they may be taken in by these sharks.

I took great delight in taking the wind out the guy from NPower’s sails when I rendered his spiel obsolete, by having the facts I’d garnered form the Internet to hand – which I quoted back to him.

While I’m on the subject why do they always start with the same line of “I’m not trying to sell you anything,” when they knock at your door, when the end of a successful conversation on their part involves taking away my bank details to process and plunder.

I have also had to change my home insurance, take out a new mortgage/income protection policies - added to this I now have a critical insurance policy that I have just taken out.

With pay day well over a week away the Clark coffers are certainly a little threadbare to say the least – though if I was to cark it tomorrow – my estate would garner untold riches according to small print in the critical illness policy.

The same small print also says I wouldn’t covered in the event of suicide in the first twelve months – which is fine as I have no intentions of topping myself.

But in twelve months time, if a pile of my clothes turn up on a beach near here – don’t worry, I’ll have claimed my untold riches and buggered off somewhere hot!